The ISIS Conspiracy Pt. 2... Finally

Sorry guys. I was wrong about two days... You see, the governments of the world don't want this information getting out, as it would ruin their reputations of keeping the world "safe" from harm. To keep this image they attempted to shut down the blog. Luckily, Nate keeps a good protection up for this URL, so we're pretty safe. Unluckily however, is the fact that I couldn't write the rest of the post because I was almost assassinated... Twice. You see, as long as I still have the rest of the story in my head, I'm a target because I can still leak it. The only thing that will keep me alive is if I tell the rest because if I die after it will look suspicious. Even more suspicious than if I died after posting the first. I'll talk about the assassination attempts later. Anyway... Back to the story.

Nate's beautiful code. It's even in Hacker Font

So Michael Narcs just stated that he vanished, and he was declared a hero. Unsurprisingly, after eating the goo, the man became temporarily invincible, and managed to escape through the rubble and debris. After discovering the fact that the radioactive waste was actually beneficial, the man found it fitting to tell his only relative, his great Uncle Haffid. Haffid was a buisness man who also dabbled in the arts of black magic occasionally. When his great nephew Damach approached him with this knowledge, Haffid figured it would be a great opportunity to invest. So, Haffid hired a bunch of people to look for more of this radioactive material. He hoped to bring wealth to him and Damach so that they could travel like gypsies to the Soviet Union like they had always wanted. Sadly, this wouldn't happen...

Soviet Union. Haffid doesn't know it doesn't exist anymore.

A few weeks later something was discovered in the great wasteland. A single page from a notebook was found scribbled on in black ink. It read "Creative". The people were puzzled. Utterly astounded, they brought the page to Haffid. One stayed behind however, and he dug up a little of the ground around the notebook. He dug about three inches when he felt something squishy. He pulled it out and realized it was a human kidney. Disgusted, he threw it on the ground. He then looked at the ground once more and saw small branches of a tree buried deep underground. He ran back with the group, not saying a word.

The black branches aren't this big. They are just branches. Not trees.

Haffid and Damach decided this find was too important to let some measly peasants work on, so they went with them. Sadly they lost a worker since the one guy that stayed behind disappeared last night. Coward... They followed the group until they reached the part in the desert where the page was found, only to find barrels filled with the same nuclear waste. They were ecstatic. They gathered up their cement trucks and filled them with the waste. Only a few noticed the odd branches littered upon and in the ground around the sight, and only one noticed the pieces of organic material lying beside the barrels. She didn't say anything, in fear of being persecuted because she was a woman. Later that night, all the barrels were empty, and the people left the site.

Kind of what the barrels looked like. Just to give you a picture.

Sorry guys for this again, but I am going to have to leave off there. I don't want to post too much at a time. I know there may be another attempt of assassination, but believe me, it'll make a cool story. Stay tuned for part three. Sometime... hopefully it comes sooner than this one, but you never know.

Partridge Gets Lucky

If you haven't seen this already you need to.  It features this guy named Partridge dancing along to Daft Punk's Get Lucky.

It can really put a smile on a bad day, and it loops, making it even better!

This is simply the best

So what are you waiting for?

Partridge Gets Lucky

Ernest Hemingway's true identity

After researching for 2 years on the topic, we have discovered that Ernest Hemingway, the famous American author did not kill himself.  He is still alive through memory, to this day, and known by many, many people around the world.  But the way he is still alive may not be known by but a select group of people.  Let me explain my research before revealing his true identity.

Ernest, writing one of his famous works. Wikimedia Commons

Hemingway wrote many books, including the famous "The Old Man and the Sea".  It is about a very old man who is an unlucky fisherman, until one day he catches a huge marlin.  He battles with it for over 2 days, and he eventually kills it.  On the way back home, sharks come and eat his prized fish after they smell its blood.  The man becomes discouraged and the last we hear of the old man before the book ends he goes to bed.

The Old Man and the Sea, arguably his most famous book. Wikimedia Commons

This book is in the Modernist style.  In other words, it deals with Futility.  The book is pointless, or maybe it teaches us that life is meaningless.  Another interpretation is that you will never succeed at your greatest goal. Remember that for later.

Ernest Hemingway also loved hunting and fishing.  He was well known for his skills and abilities for catching large game and fish.  Hemingway will always be remembered for his ability to catch any animal he wanted to, even humongous animals in Africa.

During one of his excursions in Africa, there was a huge bushfire which scattered ashes everywhere and injured Hemingway badly.  This contributed to his suffering health.

Hemingway died in a place called Ketchum, Idaho.  He had brain problems, probably from drinking so much.  On his deathbed he probably was saddened at the fact that he could no longer write stories like he used to.  Everyone was very sad about his death.  But we still have his memory to remember.

The Hemingway Memorial, Wikimedia Commons

So, who is representing Ernest Hemingway today?

Well. He:

1. Never succeeds at the greatest goals in his life
2. He is a great hunter for animals.
3. And he is related to Ketchum, Idaho.

And the person is...

ASH KETCHUM, from the Pokémon series!!!

Ash Ketchum, Wikimedia Commons

How can this be??

Well, Ash never, EVER succeeds at his ultimate goal, to win any major Pokémon competition/league.  Just like a modernist would believe.

Ash catches many Pokémon throughout his adventures, just like Hemingway catching animals.

His name is Ketchum, just like where HEMINGWAY LAST WAS ALIVE.

Here is my deduction:
Ernest Hemingway, right before he died wrote a pamphlet about a character he wanted to be put on a cartoon.  He named him Ash, for the ashes during the bushfire in Africa, and Ketchum, where he was living at the time.

Then he hid it away. It wasn't found until the late 1990s when the Anime was first aired.

So there you have it! Ash Ketchum, the Anime character that holds Ernest Hemingway's memory to this day.

The truth about Ebola, ISIS, and Nuclear Waste, part 1

So while staying up last night, I discovered something shocking. I like to browse the internet when I get bored and came across an article about ISIS, nuclear waste, and Ebola. Sadly, when I came back for the hyperlink this morning the site was shut down. Luckily, I have a photographic memory, so I can even include some quotes that I remember.

Piramede inwo, Wikimedia Commons

For those who don't know about ISIS: It is a very dangerous terrorist group that has access to weapons and hates the U.S. They are a scary group that threaten all of our lives. However, the true terror is on how they came about. This will shock you.

Late one night, June 29th 2012 NASA was picking up some heat signatures on some satellites they have tracking the middle east. The heat was estimated to be around 2278 degrees Celsius. NASA zoomed in their satellite lens only to find nuclear waste cans laying in the middle of the desert. Three 8-ton barrels lay full of the green goo you might find inside of nuclear waste containers. That's when NASA realized that no one has the means in the Middle East to move 8-ton barrels of nuclear waste, and where would they get the barrels in the first place. The team started flipping out. They contacted world governments to alert them of possible nuclear war. This was a understatement of what was about to happen.

STS-68, Wikimedia Commons

A few days later when Astro-physicist Michael Narcs was monitoring the barrels, he noticed a shadowy figure approach the barrels. Too stunned to do anything, Narcs just watched in horror as the man dipped his hand in the barrel. He pulled out the goo and looked at it curiously. He began to raise his hand toward his mouth ever so slowly. Narcs finally snapped out of it and hit the first button he could find. This happened to be the launch button for smallest test rocket NASA had, weighing about 20 lbs and standing 5 feet long.. It had launched for the exact coordinates the man about to eat the nuclear waste was standing. The missile headed straight for the man at Mach 5. Before the missile hit, the man licked the waste. The missile hit him head on and exploded in a fiery burst. When the wreckage and dust subsided, all that was left were remnants of barrels as the last bit of waste seeped in the ground. The man was gone.

Nuclear Waste, Wikimedia Commons

Narcs stated after the incident, "He disappeared. He simply vanished. I am not sure if the blast simply shattered his atoms apart, or if he somehow survived and ran, but one thing was for certain; that was awesome." Narcs was regarded as a hero throughout the world. Luckily for the governments around the world the people were so focused on the 4th of July that no one noticed. No one questioned anything. To keep you all in suspense, I will release part two in two days.

Our plan for world peace

World peace comes from neutron stars. No, this isn't your normal plan for world peace.  But continue reading to learn more.

Neutron Star, Wikimedia Commons

Neutron stars are very tiny remnants of stars, with the matter very tightly compacted.  A star only 2 to 3 times larger than our son can turn into a neutron star that can fit inside a city with the size of 142.6 sq miles.  That is like taking earth's population and squeezing it down into the size of a sugar crystal.

Now, if we were ever able to get our hands on some, scientists have discovered that only a teaspoonful of a neutron star would contain over 10 billion tons of mass.

Now, say we dropped only a teaspoon of neutron star onto earth.

Measurement Spoons, Wikimedia Commons

The neutron star would not be able to be held up by anything on earth, and would rip through the earth picking up enormous momentum, so much in fact it would go past the earth's core and continue out the other end of the earth.  Now say this goes on a bunch of times...

Earth would have a bunch of holes in it. Not large holes, but holes indeed.

We could then compare the earth to Swiss Cheese, which also has holes.

Swiss Cheese, Wikimedia Commons

And we all know that the Swiss people of Switzerland are neutral, or in other words, a peaceful people.

Switzerland's Flag, Wikimedia Commons

So the world would in essence become a neutral, peaceful Swiss cheese world.

And there you have it folks, World Peace*.

*Patent Pending



If you read all this through and believed it... Well, then.

Mega Rayquaza - Omega Ruby Alpha Sapphire

Recently a new Mega Evolution for Pokemon Alpha Sapphire and Omega Ruby was announced! Mega Rayquaza is to be in both of the games. It's ability Delta Storm negates all weather effects, and makes super effective moves against flying, only do normal damage! It also came with a new move Dragon Ascent does massive damage, being the most powerful Flying type move in the game.

Pokemon fans everywhere are excited for the release of these new games, whether they are into older or newer Pokemon games, because it is a remake of the old Ruby and Sapphire games. With this new announcement, I hope that Delta Emerald isn't just a rumor and really comes to light. ORAS comes out November 21st for the 3DS. I'm super excited for this new title and the new features coming with it.

For more information: Mega Rayquaza

Super Smash Bros. 4

So yesterday was a very stressful/exciting day. The New Smash Bros, Super Smash Bros. 4, finally got released in the U.S. Knowing this game was coming out on Friday, got me through the week. I had it all planned out that I'd come home and see the Amazon package sitting on the table, I would open it up, rip out the game, and start playing the rest of the weekend. Sadly, that wasn't the case.

My game actually came around 6:30, much later than when I come home. Those few hours were awful. I didn't know if my game was going to come on time or not. This may not seem like a big deal to some, but if you love SSB like I do, you'll understand.

Finally the game came and I almost cried tears of joy. I opened up the game as fast as possible and started playing. This game is so great! I love the new roster. Sure we could go without Dr. Mario and Dark Pit, but overall Nintendo made good decisions on it. My favorite characters as of now are Greninja and Zero Suit Samus. I mained as Zero Suit in Brawl, and she's been buffed extremely in SSB4, so i'm definitely excited for that. As for Greninja, when I got Pokemon Y I chose my starter to be the cute little frog and took him all the way to the Pokemon League. After that, I was planning my competitive team and realized he'd be a perfect fast special sweeper, especially with Protean. When I heard he was being released in SSB4 I was ecstatic. He's become one of my favorite Pokemon of all time and now I get to continue to fight with him in another one of my beloved franchises.

Greninja

Zero Suit Samus

As for physics, it feels a lot like Brawl rather than Melee which I know most people were hoping for. At least the excessive tripping was fixed. Also, it feels a lot faster than Brawl did. Running is so much quicker, and heavies like Bowser don't move at the pace of a snail stuck in molasses. Sorry, to those who expected something more like Melee this game, but Nintendo realizes that it has a lot of casual gamers who don't care about the technicalities that Melee has, but instead just want a fun and unique beat em' up style game that is fun to play with friends.

Going along with mechanics (sort of) is the new customization feature. This allows you to customize every character in the game how you want to play them using items that increase stats in Attack, Defense, and Speed. This is one of my favorites, because I love fast characters. In a game like this I need to be super mobile. Some of my favorite characters, for example Ike, are so freaking slow. His attack is amazing, but his speed kills it. Now I can add a few speed items on him and he'll be running around as fast as Toon Link. Sadly, the items have drawbacks. Each stat that the item increases, has one that it decreases. Speed decreases Attack, Attack decreases Defense, and Defense decreases Speed. So in order to make Ike a fast murderous machine, I have to put at least one Attack item on him, which sadly takes away Speed and Defense because I take up an item slot I could be using for Speed. Even with this drawback, this works really well. I can make Zero Suit even faster and even stronger than before.

Mario, being customized

Another mechanic that goes along with customization is moves. You can now customize characters special *B* attacks. If you want Zero Suit to dash toward an enemy, rather than using a whip you can! It's amazing that Nintendo added all this customization to characters, rather than just having us use these already molded characters that we have to bend to. Sadly, these two features are not able to be used online. They can be used with Local Battles between friends, but the world wide connectivity doesn't support this.

Specials

There are tons of new game modes such as Smash Run where you pick a character and run around beating up random enemies for 5 minutes to collect boosts to your stats. After the time is up, you then face a challenge that puts those stat boosts to the test. It could be any challenge from a regular battle, to a race across a map. Other game modes include Multi-Man, Home-Run Challenge, and a new Bomb Challenge similar to Angry Birds. Nintendo adding all this stuff to the 3ds version of Smash was an amazing move. The DS is a portable system, so allowing these short game modes to be played on it, fits with this device very well.

Overall this game has met my expectations. The character roster is awesome, almost solely because of Greninja and Rosalina, but there are other good characters too. Sticking to a Brawl formula was the best move Nintendo could make, and I was better at Brawl to begin with so I'm not complaining about that. The new game modes are wonderful, allowing someone to play a quick. The customization is probably my favorite part. It allows for such a different way of playing, and can lead to characters that work better for a specific person, or crazy combinations such as a tanky Toon Link, or a super fast Bowser. SBB4 is an amazing game, and after playing it for about a day I'm blown away. This is a great game for everyone, whether they've been playing since the N64 version, or just starting out.